When I first started hearing about college students whining about being “triggered” by words, I thought it was some sort of Saturday Night Live parody.

When these immature brats began demanding “safe spaces” so they wouldn’t be subjected to “offensive” opinions, it dawned on me that this idiocy was becoming a trend.

I knew we were in serious trouble when I started reading about college students demanding that “controversial” speakers be banned from their campuses.

Because, in the name of “diversity,” of course, opposing views will simply not be tolerated.

Every time I hear about these little cream puffs, who fall apart if someone else’s opinion hurts their feelings or offends their delicate sensibilities, I just shake my head.  I can’t even imagine how any of them will manage to get a job, much less keep one, if they have to take orders from a boss who actually expects them to work without having a “safe space” to run to if the going gets tough.

The story out of Emory University yesterday is so beyond insane, it actually defies reality.  The scariest part of all, however, is that it’s not satire.

It seems that there is a student among them who is [GASP!] a Donald Trump supporter.

If that weren’t a criminal enough act in itself, that Trump supporting student had the audacity, THE ABSOLUTE AUDACITY, I TELL YOU, to actually write “Donald Trump 2016” in chalk – YES, CHALK! – all across campus.

The snowflakes positively MELTED!

Of course, they immediately sprang into action and organized a protest against the CHALKINGS!

According to the Emory Wheel, protestors gathered in front of the administration building shouting, “You are not listening! Come speak to us, we are in pain!”

Because CHALK HURTS!

One particularly delicate snowflake told the student newspaper, “I’m supposed to feel comfortable and safe [here], but this man is being supported by students on our campus and our administration shows that they, by their silence, support it as well … I don’t deserve to feel afraid at my school.”

Oh, dear.  It’s much worse than even I originally thought.

A college junior claimed that when he saw one “Trump 2016” chalking, he didn’t think much of it because “it was an isolated incident.”  But when he saw “multiple chalkings,” he was ALARMED!

University President James W. Wagner actually pleaded in a meeting with students, “What actions should I take?”  One of them responded with a request that Emory send out a University-wide email to “decry the support for this fascist, racist candidate.”

Obviously clueless that there is nothing more fascist than shutting down free speech – and declaring only one “official” opinion – the students promptly demanded more “diversity.”

Completely missing the irony of their own childish rhetoric.

The overgrown, coddled babies were so TERRIFIED of the CHALKINGS that the Student Government Association finally relented by OFFERING EMERGENCY COUNSELING FOR STUDENTS TRIGGERED!

No, seriously.  This is NOT a joke.

The SGA sent out an email:

“That being said, by nature of the fact that for a significant portion of our student population, the messages represent particularly bigoted opinions, policies, and rhetoric directed at populations represented at Emory University, we would like to express our concern regarding the values espoused by the messages displayed, and our sympathy for the pain experienced by members of our community…

It is clear to us that these statements are triggering for many of you. As a result, both College Council and the Student Government Association pledge to stand in solidarity with those communities who feel threatened by this incident and to help navigate the student body through it and the environment of distrust and unease it has created.

To that end, Emergency Funds within the College Council monetary policy were created to provide time-sensitive funds during circumstances involving discrimination based on race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, and such funds are available to any student organization looking to sponsor events in response to this incident.”

Despite the university’s desperate pandering to their irrational FEAR OF CHALK, the “deeply offended” students are now demanding the resignation of the University President.

As expected, the internet exploded with derision, sarcasm and howls of laughter.

Comments on the Emory University Facebook page are absolutely hysterical:

“Emory University president says students are scared and ‘in pain’ after someone wrote ‘Trump 2016’ in chalk on campus.”  LOL LOL Is this an early April Fool’s Day joke?”

“Is it all chalk that traumatizes the little students or just certain colors of chalk….”

“Oh no!… CHALK!!!! I’m so afraid!!!!”

“**TRUMP 2016! BOO!***  Haha! Did I scare you?”

“So…. Does anyone that graduates from here actually get a job? Or do they end up on disability, cause words hurt? #trump2016 #thetriggering2016″

“It’s mass hysteria at Emory.”

“Emory University is a day care?”

“Is this a joke or is the Emory the most embarrassing institution in America?”

“I know what college my kids will never go to.”

“‘Traumatized’ by Trump supporters? Is this “Weenie University”?”

Some commenters were deeply offended by the absurdity of the “deeply offended” students:

“Emory University is the laughing stock of the world right now. OOOhhh my feelings are hurt. Emory is having to bring in counselors for their weak minded students. The students complaining are probably on scholarship, those scholarships need to be revoked and given to people who are strong not whiny babies. I hope all the Emory patrons quit donating money as it is being spent on students who are babies. Maybe all those babies need to join the military and they will grow up and see what the real world is like.”

“Not a Trump fan but those “offended” students are absolutely pathetic. Who on earth raised or taught these little snowflakes? How on earth will these little pajama boys and girls function in the real world? Men their age fought and died for freedom of speech in WWII and this is what resulted a few generations later? Shame on all of you. Suck it up, buttercups!”

Of course, I just had to put in my two cents:

“This is what happens when everyone gets a participation trophy in Little League, where everyone “wins” even if they lose. I dealt with the parents of these little monsters for years when I ran a local Little League. Now their progeny are college students who still need assurances that they are wonderful and deserve an award just for showing up. Imagine what will happen to their delicate psyches when their first job applications are rejected! They’ll run home to mommy and daddy, crying their eyes out. What a generation of freaks!”

In an extremely profane, “deeply offensive” Fox Sports College Football Blog, Clay Travis wrote:

“Hold the [bleep] up, “Trump 2016” is a bigoted statement now? I swear to god I may end up voting for Donald Trump just because I hate the PC bros who hate Donald Trump infinitely more than I hate Donald Trump … All they had to do to remove the images was pour out their bottled water on top of them or, they could have been really brilliant and written NOT in front of TRUMP 2016. Instead they decided to protest.

Seriously, protest.

“WE HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE BUT OUR CHAINS!”

Mother[bleep]s, you are going to a school that costs $65,000 a year, you are not slaves. The only people in chains here are your parents, who probably should have beaten your spoiled asses with a cat o’nine tails so you didn’t grow up to be such huge p*****s.”

All this nonsense happening on college campuses now has me even more convinced that I did the right thing by teaching my kids that in sports, and in life, we play to win.

At the end of every Little League season when I tossed out those ridiculous participation trophies, I reminded my kids that winning is everything, there can be only one winner, and only losers move back home with mommy after college.

As a result, my three children managed to survive college “unoffended,” graduate on their own merits, find gainful employment, and become successful, independent, responsible, and contributing members of society.

What the Emory snowflakes need is a massive dose of reality when they finally grow up.

After mommy changes their diapers, of course.

Stephanie Kienzle
“Spreading the Wealth”