Here’s the pitch:

Three dudes are sitting around, watching the game, having a brew.  Some chick knocks on the door, walks in and accuses one of the friends, Mathieu, of stealing her cash outta her car the day before.

While Mathieu’s babe is chewing him out, his two buddies are having a little disagreement that can only be resolved with fists.

Annoyed by the turmoil, Mathieu whips out his gun, points it at his buddy, Moller’s face and tells him to cut the crap.

The third pal, Carly, tries to stop Mathieu from blowing Moller’s face off.

He tries to wrestle the gun from Mathieu’s hand.

He misses.

Mathieu brushes Carly off and aims at Moller again.

He shoots.

He misses.

Moller heads for the door, threatens his buddies, takes some random shots in the air and runs off.

Someone calls the police.

They find Mathieu the next day hiding out.

In his own house.

Mathieu figures the gig is up so he admits ripping the bitch off for eighty bucks.

He admits pointing a gun at his buddies.

“But, those weren’t my bullets.  I never shot that gun.  Musta been someone else.”

The cops find the gun in Matthieu’s room and arrest him.

Mattieu gets a mugshot.

Mathieu is charged with:

• Attempted Murder with a Firearm
• Aggravated Assault
• Improper Exhibition of a Firearm
• Petit Theft

 

The only thing Mathieu isn’t charged with is Stupidity, which, unfortunately is not a crime.

The other unfortunate thing is that this is a true story.

See NMBPD Press Release dated today.

I really couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.

Welcome to my ‘hood.

Stephanie Kienzle
“Spreading the Wealth”